To those curious souls interested in the things that do not fit neatly into a traditional bio,
I’m a filmmaker by trade, but I have tried many things along the way. And these many things have shaped the way I see and tell stories. Here are a few of them.
I was a congressional intern for the House Majority Leader, Dick Armey, whom I only saw once. More accurately, I was the lackey of a moderately angry woman with a GOP tattoo on her ankle, who assigned me the important task of opening all the mail from all the people who wanted to warn the Congressman about the aliens.
I was an apprentice of a Napolitano pizziaolo, named Carmine, who spoke zero English and insisted that I would be a great pizzamaker if I would just stop dropping the pizzas on the floor, and if I would turn into a man.
I was a federal budget researcher at a very conservative think tank where I was very much a problem on a daily basis because I was raised by an NPR-listening, social worker father and a small-business owning mother who, after watching the Clarence Thomas hearings, cast a write-in vote for Anita Hill for President.
I was a small-time YouTube sensation for a few weeks, because I made a video asking the President to give me back my payroll taxes. He eventually gave everyone their payroll taxes back, but not because he saw my video.
I was an economic television pundit, until I quit because I did not like arguing on television with middle-aged white men for a living.
I was a wedding video editor after spending two uncomfortable years getting a D in multivariate calculus, which mysteriously turned into a B+ after the curve, subsequently earning me a piece of paper that made the provocative claim that I was a "master" of economics.
And I was a lifestyle model whose main job was to take small children who were not my own and pretend like they believably came out of my body, while wiping the snot out of their nose and balancing the tiny beast on a fruit-shaped pool raft.
Currently, I am a human who observes curious things and tells stories about them.
-Michelle
